Posted by John Behle on March 07, 2003 at 01:24:01:
In Reply to: Re: Exactly as you described. posted by Kati on March 06, 2003 at 23:45:00:
I wish I had more thoroughly documented the back and Fibromyalgia problems such that they could be additional and sole reasons for the disability. Now in the review, they check my heart and say "go away".
It's like with Afib. If you can make it to the doctor's office and they look at you and you look ok, they assume you can work - even if it is an extremely good day. On a bad day, I wouldn't make the appointment and I'm not about to pretend I feel worse than I do at that moment. I do wish I could have kept the disability until some kind of solution other than extreme pain medication might surface for my back.
With the original application, it was a joke. Basically, they decline almost everyone at first and make you go through an appeal. After the appeal process and gathering information to which many doctors didn't bother to respond or send records, they held a hearing.
I was too sick to attend the first one. Instead of taking that into account, the judge was basically just upset about it. In the second (and to be final) hearing, they were ready to decline me. Some old creature that got his M.D. during the Revolutionary War was theorizing as to how good my condition was and he didn't see any problem. I just about was thrown out as I blurted out that maybe he could consider checking my pulse since I was in a severe case of Afib at the time. Apparently it is against their policy for the decripid "jack of all trades" washed out doc to actually examine or even look at a patient. I could have passed out at his feet and he would have still considered I was ok. While he was sharing of his vast medical knowledge and wisdom, my attorney was furiously searching through their manual until he came to the section about "near Syncopy". Once they saw that, then all of a sudden it's ok. My condition didn't matter, the only thing that mattered is if it fit into some section in their manual.
It just seemed a little ironic that the AFIB that was extremely disabling was not "enough" for them - where the Fibromyalgia or back problems might have gone through smoothly, though they are minor in comparison.
I'm not a big one for playing games, so when meeting with the docs, etc. I probably minimized the conditions as opposed to those they were used to who might have been less afflicted - except in their acting ability.
With AFIB for so long, I guess I had become real good at putting on a cover up. Since no one seems to understand it or care, it became easier to minimize it like they try to. I used to kind of laugh to myself as I coverd it up so successfully. Many times when giving a seminar, I would literally be holding on to the podium for dear life to not fall over - and yet no one would know. I'm not sure anyone that doesn't experience AFIB can have any clue as to how you can be normal one minute and not able to stand the next. And sometimes it can reverse just as quickly. Most think it is in your head or you are avoiding something - like hard work. It's a tough thing to deal with, so I just covered it up as much as I could and learned to take satisfaction in my ability to do so.